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2 definitions by Captain Cackpipe

 
1.
Ordinarily the main piste on a ski map which joins the middle station of any European ski resort to the town, and the only way down once the lifts stop at 16:30. After which, however, it turns into an assault course of retard adult learners who are either; snowploughing down a slushy red run wining about who’s fault it was and probably blaming their skis or the snow because they don’t have the balls to put into practise what the poor ski instructor has been attempting to teach their inept sorry ass. Or, they’re making the most of their last day by skiing the length of the resort to the bottom, even though they lack the physique and brains to realise that they’re just white-trash cretins who should leave this sport to those who don’t piss their lives away in a two-star crappy apartment pretending to enjoy themselves, completely missing the whole point of skiing and being in the mountains, only to ruin the last run of the day for everyone else before catching the barf-coach to the airport for their cheapo flight home to remortgage their homes and continue their miserable existence.
Last one down gets the drinks?...Fuck that, I ain't going down spack alley on a Saturday unless we stay in this hut till dark. Get 'em in.
door Captain Cackpipe 8 september 2011
 
2.
The bluntest tool in the box that believes that he/she can get away with wearing a brightly-coloured patterned 70s all-in-one jump suit on a ski piste, whilst all around them decent human beings are getting on with their lives. Clearly these clueless spanners have misunderstood the meaning of re-living their pasts and have renounced any hope of future poon-pummelling by insisting on dressing like tits who should otherwise contribute to society by going home and change everything about your simple meaningless existence, including their wardrobe. Stop doing and start thinking, you cretins.
You have certainly found your place in society with a face like that whilst wearing that shit. Have you totally given up on life you fashion infraction?
door Captain Cackpipe 10 september 2011